Monday, November 15, 2010

Q&A




"Why do you blog, what do you learn from your blogs?"

My blog and myself have gone through a huge transformation since I started in March of last year, and my reasons have changed with it. In the beginning I posted only famous quotations as a way of reaching out to other people, I didn't want it to be about me. I still do it now mainly for the same reason (to reach other people hopefully), but this time it's mostly through my own words. I like to discuss my experiences and write about things that raise eyebrows and make people a bit uncomfortable, because I think it's really important to create dialogue. But I try not to make it too heavy around here so I post an occasional short story or poem I've written, usually romantic. Yeah I'm a sucker for that stuff.

I don't know if I've learned things from my blogs as much as I've learned things through them. My readers are just amazing, in the beginning I hoped but never imagined that I'd be able to have the friendships I do now. Most bloggers I know are younger than I am, and they've taught me a lot. I've learned you can live a lifetime before you're twenty. I've learned that many young people are wiser and more mature than some adults I know. I've learned that everyone needs someone to confide in, I think deep down we all want to reach out even if we don't always think we feel that desire. I've learned that many of us build walls but few want them. I've learned that blogging is a paradox because although I'll never meet most of you I've become friends with, I find I'm able to get to know you more deeply than those around me. I don't have intimate discussions about secrets, heartaches and fears with my 'real life' friends like I do with you. I think the reason for it is that the computer creates more of a sense of comfort and safety once you feel you can trust a person, sometimes more than a face-to-face friendship.  Do you agree or am I just crazy?

I'm curious to know what you guys think. Are you more comfortable sharing personal things about yourself with your blogging friends than those you hang out with? Do you have anyone on-line you can trust to say anything to?

8 comments:

  1. I seldom share with friends. Mostly once when I had a major crisis, I opened up to someone. People tell me their stuff though which I find odd because it is usually not reciprocal.

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  2. What a beautiful and insightful post! Love it. I agree, you're bonkers ;p Hehe. Sorry, I'm being silly. It is definitely easier to say things, and connect with people on a deeper level, with that sense of comfort and safety you describe. It's something, I personally have found a hard time doing with people who are face to face friends. I watch people reach this sort of intimacy with others, or maybe I perceive it that way; however, when I'm put in the same situation, I find myself closing up, emotionally. My conversations are almost robotic, because that's the extent to which I think them out before I speak; afraid that I'll reveal too much, and they'll catch my vulnerability and laugh, or worse, use it against me. It's a kind of loneliness, I can't even describe to you. In some ways, this is so much easier, I say so much more than I could ever say to my 'real life' friends, and that is very liberating. It's like clawing my way out of a grave in which I was buried alive, and finally breaking through to the surface. I'm sorry if I sound too cryptic. It's just one of those days.

    Anyway, I'll stop before I ramble too much. Like always, love the post, I always find your words to have great meaning. :)

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  3. I trust my blogging friends more than friends I hang out with. Usually my readers and blogging friends give me the truth without sugar coating. And yes I have you and Sandy :)

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  4. I would have to agree with you entirely. It is so much easier to open up and share through a computer. There is a sense of security. The things I have shared online with people I am close with many people in my life do not even know about me. Blogs are amazing things.

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  5. Funny, but I find I am much closer to my blogger friends and trust them far more than those who live close to me. Is that crazy or what?!

    I do have 3 blogger friends that I have been open with and vulnerable to about my hurts and pains and life....thank you!!

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  6. I trust both bloggy friends and true friends -- my real-life friends and I often talk about the deep subjects of life. Because of time & distance limitations, we often do it by email and sometimes I'll find that writing a long letter later morphs into a blog post. The thing that blogging has done for me though, is open up a whole new series of relationships where I can *really* connect. It's so rewarding! I'd never have imagined how much so. I totally get what you're saying here. :)

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  7. Well I think it has to do with how well you approach people, and how much your willing to give your heart out to them. For me, I find it hard to say how I feel out loud. But with writing I always find myself at ease since I have time to think about how I will form an explanation towards my feelings.

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