Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Be There

  A line in the chorus of this song really ties in with how I've been feeling lately.  Blogging to me has always been so much more than talking about how my day's been.  It's about connecting with people who, though they may be thousands of miles away, are every bit the friends that those around me are.

  Lately I haven't had a lot of time to visit you guys.  Most would say this is something we should do in our 'spare' time, something that shouldn't intrude too much in our 'real' lives.  But when you make friends like this, to me the definition of 'real' becomes blurred.  Why should an on-line friend be any less important in our lives than those tangibles we can see?

  I know I'm off-track when some of my readers friends ask me if the reason I haven't visited them lately is because they've done something to upset me.  It's become more frequent over the past week, and it bothers me that I've let it get to this.  So for those of you who may be wondering I want to assure you that:

  • you haven't upset me
  • you haven't pissed me off
  • if you had, I'd man-up and write you so we could discuss it like adults
  • I haven't somehow grown tired of you
  • you're on my mind as much as you ever were
      and most importantly,
  • I miss you.  I do.
  The line in this song that got me is, "If you're gonna be there, be there."  It's so simple but to me very powerful.  You don't make a friend and abandon them.  You don't just walk into someone's life and walk out.  You don't tell someone you'll be a shoulder then leave when things get too tough for them or you.  I've had moments in my life that have been extremely hard to deal with, that I've wanted to walk away because it was too painful to stay.  It's hard to see people go through certain things, sometimes they don't realize how it can affect you.  But it's selfish to abandon that promise of love and support.  Being a friend, a lover, a spouse is about giving of yourself regardless of how it affects you. If you're gonna be there, be there. It's a committment we make, spoken or not.

  We all impact someone's life, some more than others.  I know I don't connect with everyone, and that's okay because I don't expect to.  But I've formed friendships with many of you, some of you I've grown very close to.  I don't expect to change your life, I'm just me doing what I can.  But if I can make some sort of a difference to your day here or there it's all I could ask for.

  I promise I'm trying harder to get around to all of your blogs.  I also realize I haven't been responding to comments as much as I should (virtual slap on the wrist).  I want to change that.  I still have some old e-mails to respond to. It never ends does it?

  Just know if you haven't heard from me for a while I'm still thinking about you.  I said I'm gonna be here, and I'm here.


  1. Very nice, Barry. I'm with you 100%. If only more people could be like you.

  2. This is just so sweet. I love this and appreciate your sweetness!! Ps. love that song.

  3. I like knowing that Barry. Thank You.

  4. Never thought any different, buddy. Just life getting in the way....

  5. I think I'm part of the problem. *wink* and for that I kind of apologize to your friends although I'm sure they will totally understand that the needs of a wife come very high on the list of priorities.
    Life gets in the way. I know I've been feeling so overwhelmed lately. I also know that a lot of people haven't been keeping up too much lately, myself included.
    You are an amazing man and I wish I could be more like you in many ways. But we are all individuals and that's what makes us so perfect together. I think we both push each other, finish each other.
    love you more than words will ever be able to express.

  6. Don't be so hard on yourself! It's almost impossible to stay up on blog comments and emails.

  7. Okay now that my wife has dropped the hint you have to admit that of all the reasons to be short on time, "gettin' busy" is one of the best.

  8. "You don't tell someone you'll be a shoulder then leave when things get too tough for them or you."

    "...But it's selfish to abandon that promise of love and support."

    This post and the words above really brought tears to my eyes. I have (unfortuanately) experienced that WAY too much in my life. I cannot bear it to happen anymore, thus why I tend to retreat into a place of silence, but I know that is not good either. I need friends and those who TRULY care just as much as you or anyone else. If we all were a bit more loving and less selfish, imagine how the world would be today.

    Thanks for the wonderful words you wrote.

  9. Youre awesome Barry. JUST AWESOME AND AMAZING!!